TODAY I met up with my lovely friend Lou who insists on living in a land far, far away and who I only get to see far too infrequently.

We had a great time catching up, chatting, hearing each other’s news, when the discussion inevitably turned to men.  Lou is newly single and I am forever single (feels like) and so of course we discussed what potential there is out there for a young and gorgeous gal (Lou) and a slightly older but still (hopefully) attractive gal (me).

I was telling Lou about a chap I recently went out with, who I had to re-schedule a date with due to falling ill.  After a couple of texts, the communication ground to a halt and I never heard from him again.  I told Lou that I wasn’t even that attracted to him but it annoyed me just the same.

“So why did you go out with him” Lou sensibly asked. “Because I thought he might be my Harry” I responded and she immediately knew what I meant.  Sex and the City.

For those of you asleep during the early noughties, Charlotte, the pretty, pleasant, perennially single girl on SATC, constantly on the look out for a husband, finally met her and married her dream man.  Alas he turned out not to be the full package (pardon the pun) and so she went through a divorce and hey presto, her divorce lawyer was the short, bald, and let’s face it, not that physically attractive man who turned out to be her real dream fella.

Lou felt that Sex and The City and particularly that story line, has added yet more confusion to the already fraught minefield of dating.  She quite rightly pointed out that now all girls think that the guy they are least attracted to, might just be their Harry.  This is true!!  How many of you single types out there have agreed to more dates that you should have just in case?  How many of you have been bitterly disappointed?  How many decent, but not quite right fellas have been left baffled when you abruptly ended things knowing that it was going no-where?

Sex and the City did a number on a lot of us.  At the end of the series, Carrie gets her man, and lives happily every after, proving once and for all that someone who breaks you heart, treats you like crap and runs rings around you for years will in fact eventually realize that you are the one for him.  Except that we all know that doesn’t happen in real life.  Oh and as an aside can I just say that Big was a tool and I’d have married Aiden in a heartbeat.  But I digress.

I think Lou was right when she said what we single girls should do is look for a man we are compatible with and go from there.  You might not be perfect for each other but at least with some compatibility you might be able to exist on common ground.

We all know the story of the girl who almost lost the great guy because she didn’t think he was attractive enough, we all know the story of the girl who got the heartbreaker to commit, we all know the story of the booty call which turned into a marriage made in heaven.  But we also know those stories are almost always a fantasy and that in real life, you have to get out there, date the fellas you like, hope one likes you back and the rest is something you just have to work on and hope for the best.

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